What I Would Say to the Younger and Less Confident Me

Khadija Bingham

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

I just recently celebrated my 22nd birthday, and like every huge milestone in my life it bought upon deep reflection.

As I reflected on my life, I became overwhelmed with an immense amount of gratefulness, satisfaction and overall joy. I realized just how proud I am of myself and the person I am growing to be.


Eight Years ago, if you would have asked me what I would be doing at 22, I would not have been able to describe to you the things that I am currently doing. I would have begun to describe to you the plans I had for my life, not realizing that God had different plans.


While still working on many aspects of me, I know that things such as my confidence and faith have grown significantly over the past couple of years.  As I look back and think of the insecure girl I once was, I wish that I could write her a letter telling her that everything will be okay.


The obvious reality is that I cannot write a letter to that little girl, but what I can do is give guidance to all the little girls who are currently in the position that I once was.


So, to all the insecure girls who question their purpose, beauty and abilities, here are 4 things that I wish I would have known when I was where you are.


1. Real friends will come. If it seems like you are having a hard time making genuine connections or you feel like your “best friend” changes with every season, know that everything happens for a reason. God knows best for you, and he knows who you need in your life and who you do not. Allow him to remove the toxic people from your life and embrace the beautiful people he brings you. You should never have to beg people to be your friend, invite you places or just overall care about you. Let those people go, because chances are, your lives are headed in two different directions. Find you friends who have similar goals and motivators. Surround yourself with people who challenge and promote you. If you hang around negative people, negative things will happen to you and if you hang around positive people, positive things will happen to you. Our friends are a reflection of who we are.


2. Don’t be afraid to dream big. Don’t limit your dreams  because of your current circumstances and don’t base your possibilities for success on the failures that you are surrounded by. Thy sky is truly the limit, as long as you remain faithful and you work hard. Pray as if everything depends on God (because it does) and work as if everything depends on you (because faith without work is dead). If you want it, it’s yours, you just have to go out and get it.


3. People will support you. People will support you, and people will be proud of you! People that you don’t even expect. People that you thought didn’t like you. The cool kids from high school. You will have people who look up to you and you will affect so many people, just by being you.  Everyone will be so proud of you, as long as you stay humble, grateful and give back. Because to whom much is given, much is expected!


4. One day, you will wear your bold lipstick proud. You may not believe me, but one day you will wear the brightest red lip stick you can find, and you will love it. You will own it. You will not hide, but you will be proud. You will finally see what everyone has been seeing in and you will love yourself. You will love all of you, including your perfect imperfections.